If you've been here for a minute you know that I've spent the past few years slinging paint in the name of my mental health, creativity and sobriety. And then, about two weeks ago I abruptly stopped. I had an entire winter collection planned out that took weeks to prototype and I came home from a friend's house one afternoon and threw it in the fucking garbage. With confidence and terror.
I started painting during the pandemic because we had paint and all the other supplies that one needs to do such a thing because my husband used to paint. I was here, it was here, and I was in early months of sobriety trapped in a house with a three year old with endless time on my hands so... I painted. It was fun and experimental and people responded well so I started selling paintings but it never felt just right-- me, a painter. My painting evolved into a number of iterations-- you can see them on my Instagram feed-- and I planned out a winter collection of a dozen lovely designs.
Then I had the bright idea to invite Meagan of @manisandfloss into an embroidered earring collaboration. I designed these little frames to hold the embroidery and laser cut them and we got all jazzed about it at her kitchen table and BAM, I realized I could put whatever fabric I wanted into those little buggers. And something you likely didn't know about me is that I LOVE fabric and patterns.
I have loved fabric as long as I can remember-- tagging along with my mom to Joann's, inheriting my grandma's stash when she passed away, creating a fabric collection as a toy for Luna as an infant. I seriously love fabic. But I don't love sewing, even though I know how. I have a habit of buying clothes I don't need-- not because I love fashion, it's because I love fabric. And here we are.
I was really afraid to pivot so abruptly. What if my customers haven't already realized that I'm pure chaos wrapped in skin and go running for the hills? I shared this with a fellow maker and she responded "lean into it" and that encouragement sent me over the edge head first. I don't honestly see myself going back.
I put my paint on the back shelf and set up my studio all over again. I went to Goodwill (for ten minutes for just two shirts) and bought an armful of blouses and dresses to upcycle-- I'm not... good at moderation. I'm drowning in fabric and I'm swimming in joy-- and that is the whole point of all of this: to seek joy and spread it like confetti. I want to create art that inspires you to be your full, authentic self and to feel joy in the minute moments of your day. I want my art to be a glimmer that lights you up when you're feeling your best and when you need a boost and everywhere in between. Fabric brings me so much joy. I can't wait to share it with you.